Options

One Saturday, 18 months out from 'the event' which was six months after my self appointed timetable to begin dating, I was sitting on my bed working on a school project.   When working on a school project, my brain just seems to scream at me, "Do something else! Something FUN!"  So, while I was "taking a break" from my school project, I decided to create a plan for finding some men (or at the least 'a' man) to date.

I won't lie.  I had been looking around for some time at the men (or potential men) in my life and well, quite frankly, there just weren't any.

I really am opposed to work place romance.  Way too complicated and uncomfortable.  Especially if things don't work out (and often even if they do!).  I actually quit a job once (in my distant pre-marriage days) because the discomfort I felt with a co-worker that I was no longer dating. While I would like to think I am older and wiser and wouldn't have to quit over something like that, I really didn't care to find out.

I don't go to bars.  While I am not opposed to others having the occasional drink, my late husband was a recovering alcoholic so we never drank.  And we certainly didn't hang out in bars.  [OK, true confession time.  I have only been in two bars in my life--not counting the restaurants with 'bar & grill' in their  name.  Once with an exchange student's family when I was in High School--mom, did you know about that?--and the other was with an Adult Bible Study group.  We went to eat steak.  At Christmastime.  There is just something not right with both of those.]  Never-the-less, I really didn't see the sense in starting to bar hop at the ripe old age of fifty!

The only other place that I frequent on a regular basis is Church.  [If you were thinking grocery store or shopping, you were WAY off.  I go to Church much more regularly than to any place to shop as I enjoy the experience of Church significantly more!]  Church seems like the most logical place to find a potential date.  The likelihood that your mate will hold the same values and beliefs should be greater, but....  Most of the people I know at church, also knew my late husband.  In fact, many of them only knew 'of' me, but they 'knew' him.  Our church has three campuses.  My late husband was instrumental in getting the campus that my daughter and I attend up and going.  While it is the smaller of the three campuses, it is the one closest to my home so that is where I choose to attend.  It just seemed 'weird' to me to seek out potential dates among men that were my late husband's friends.  So, that option seemed closed.

So where do 50 year-old, Christian women go to find the love of their life?  What ARE her options?  That was what I really needed to figure out, on that random day when I was supposed to be working on a project for school.